Contradictions in my identity

Recently, some international students at UCLA participated in an artwork called Invisible Name, in which they wrote their names in both their native language and English, to express a double identity. Identity, again, has been on the center of the stage of American politics in recent years. But what do I identify with? A convert to Islam, a social outcast, probably also an Aspie… Groups most people identify with don’t work well for me. I resonate with people who say they’re too American to be Muslim and too Muslim to be American. Odd as I am even among international students, my identity is full of contradictions. Continue reading

Reflections on my approach

The sea wave breaks on the rock, and sea breeze makes me chill in the mist. Where am I? Where am I standing in the ocean of thoughts? It’s been almost a year since I began to explore the structure of the Quran, and half a year since I started my current approach. Now I’m looking back at the path I’ve taken so far. Does my approach work? Me half a year ago must be very disappointed; it doesn’t work that well, and it should be revised. I haven’t posted for almost a month, and I have not progressed on the second part of the second wave of Islamic reform, since I’m stuck. Click here to see what my approach is. Continue reading

Me, my approach, and how I got here

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About me

My name is Lambda Moses (pen name), and I’m an undergraduate student in UCLA. I haven’t decided my major yet. I was raised as an atheist by atheist parents in China, but I converted Sunni Islam in April 2010. My parents strongly opposed my conversion, and tried every means – including threatening to abandon me or not letting me to go to college – to drive me out of Islam. As they failed every means, and they knew that both Islam and Christianity believe in God, they converted Christianity in October 2011, hoping to let me worship the same God in a different and a more “acceptable” way. With the encounter of Christianity, I began to question Sunni Islam, especially the rituals, which are not so pronounced in Christianity. But I had problem with the Trinity, and I still didn’t want to give up the Quran, though I didn’t understand it. So I googled how to pray according to Quran alone. Then I hit Edip Yuksel, whose article “Manifesto for Islamic Reform” (http://www.19.org/578/manifesto-for-islamic-reform/)¬†convinced me to give up Hadith.

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